terribibble | Ryslig IC Contact

Ryslig IC Contact

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, FIDDLEFORD HADRON MCGUCKET. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 011.23.581.321 * teslacoils has joined 011.23.581.321 >> teslacoils has posted an AUDIO MESSAGE. If you wish to listen, type LISTEN01. <teslacoils> Lab hours are 10 AM to 6 PM Mon-Wed, 7 PM to 3 AM Thur-Fri, special appointments available. <teslacoils> I am no longer associated with the Fourth God. <teslacoils**> But I will answer any questions you might have about him with the honest truth.

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Pythonmelon
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knittinggiantbeanies

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I'm pretty damn sure we are.

[He means all of it, honestly, but particularly that kiss. He is about 99% sure he didn't hallucinate that, mainly because there's a faint aftertaste of the indescribably otherworldly Fog taste on his lips.]

You -- I knew I shouldn't've trusted you. An accident, sure.

[ For him, it's more about how he just kissed the ugliest man alive.

He waves that hand, letting the little embers dance on the air. ]

It didn't do anything for me. Don't get excited.

Nonetheless, I did tap into something and that makes it remotely palatable. What's your baggage with Elias? You only told me what Marco did.

[Before he answers Fiddleford picks up the tequila, mumbling a snippy 'show you excited, you nasty piece of work' under his breath before he takes a long swig. The adam's apple beneath his nonexistent chin bobs. Yeah. Rohan sure did pick a looker to make out with in the name of getting deets.]

Y'know, funny enough I don't think talkin' to you about Elias is goin' to go well? Not like you've got a bias or nothin'.

[ ONE KISS DOES NOT EQUAL MAKING OUT. ]

I really could care less about Elias at this point. He isn't a threat to me. Never really was.

And clearly I'm not here to fight about religious ideals. I might have just opened up a church but I'm not feeling like being off of a neutral spot right now.

But. You do you. I'm just trying to help. There was a "hiccup" in there but no harm done. At least Jotaro had a chin. A chiseled one at that.

[It does when you kiss a man who tends to react in extremes, you dingus.]

No need to be rude. I just... you have to understand why I'm cautious, is all, after...

[You drowned me, he doesn't say.]

Anyway. I just...

[He needs to talk about this. He's been desperate to talk about this for months but he hasn't really found the right person to talk about it with. He can't talk about it with his fellow Fourth followers, can he? He's a priest. He has to be a symbol of the group, an avatar of the ideals, but lately he feels as though he's missed the memo on what those ideals are.

Once he starts talking it all spills out.]

You remember that mess a while back with folks corruptin' places all over the peninsula? You remember how the Fourth God gave that kind of power to Kira, knowin' full-well what kind of person Kira was?

That's when I started... started thinkin' maybe I had a better opinion of Elias than he deserved. But he's just a child, y'know, he's a kid and thinks about things how a kid would but I can't keep usin' that as an excuse, can I? Even a kid would know Kira was a psychotic murderer.

I don't think he cares as much about... about helpin' his friends as he cares about takin' another kid's toys.

[ How could he forget? He lost the park and now he can't take certain people to the woods. Ugh.

Kira's name makes his lips curl and a big of smoke curl out from past them like a bull in the cold. ]

I do. I don't understand that pick and I never will. I won't even try to understand what that was all about... Because I did a lot of things I wish I hadn't.

[ He closes his eyes for a moment. ]

I will be honest. I do not know the inner workings of Elias or anything his followers do. I will always think that all of you are sinners who place too much trust in a child and a computer. However, I will let you formulate your own opinions on that incident.

Mine sounds biased but I will give it to you now that I know what that did to you too: I agree. Elias misplaces his abilities for the sake of fucking the rest of us [ Gesturing to where his key is over his shirt. ] over. I don't believe that he is capable of making and understanding decisions. His promises to everyone look pretty on the outside...

On the inside, not so much.

[ but who am I, girl. who am I. ]

He asked me to die for him. And I did it, over n' over, because I thought whatever he was doin' it was -- it was to help people.

That's what I've been wantin' to do from the start of things. Help everyone else stuck here with me or -- or at least the ones that want to undo what's been done to them. I know for some folks this is better.

[And he can't judge, even though he does, privately, a lot. It's still not his business, really.]

And I don't think that's wrong. But I don't think that's what Elias wants, really. I think he says that's what he wants, and I think maybe he thinks helpin's what he's doin', but...

[He waves a hand. This is hard to articulate and it would be even if he wasn't tipsy and upset.]

Y'see where I'm goin' with this?

[ Nod... ]

I understand. That sucks.

It isn't challenging your beliefs, is it?

[Well. Isn't that the million dollar question?]

... Yes. And no. It's -- it's all sorts of complicated, ain't it? I still believe we need to help the people who wind up here, and get them resources they need to deal with what's happenin' to them, and ... and find a way to change back and send home the people that want that.

[This doesn't include him, not anymore, but it hasn't for a very long while.]

But I don't think that's what Elias cares about. Everythin' he's done lately -- how did ruinin' half the peninsula help anyone? How does takin' people's memories help? How does gettin' into folks' heads and showin' everyone all the stuff they meant to keep private help?

And he keeps sayin' that's what he's doin' and it's all to help us and it's for a good reason, really, he had to, and I'm just... I'm just less and less sure we're ever goin' to see the payoff. I don't think it's comin'.

[His voice is so, so heavy. It hurts to say this aloud after spending so much time keeping it in, but it's true, isn't it?]

[ It's hard for Rohan not to sound TOO excited over this revelation.

They're both right here. ]

Then what's the point...?

[ actually

he doesn't sound happy at all. ]

Well, I... he told me, a while back, when I first started feelin' a little uncomfortable with all this, that I needed to use the power I had for good. And I think that still holds true, doesn't it? He's given me power and a platform and it's -- it's my duty to use it to do good by people even if he won't.

Okay, sure.

You say that but something in your voice tells me that you're hesitating. Maybe because you can't do 'good' without the guidance of your God showing you the way.

I'm not religious back at home, nor have I ever been, but I am pretty sure that is what the purpose of priests and prophets is. To guide. Be the hand of the God the other followers cannot see. If you are trying to guide people on a path that Elia is obscuring, what is the point?

Contemplate that.

Is it Elias who wants to do 'good' or is it just you?

Well, see, that's the whole problem right there, isn't it?

I know what good and bad are without him. I'd know what good and bad were even without the actual God, because y'know, folks keep thinkin' I worship Elias but I've always been a Christian and that hasn't changed.

[Sure, he's a pretty lazy Christian, but the fact remains he's never considered Elias a replacement for God. Elias calls himself a god, sure, and Fiddleford uses that word because it's the one Elias likes, but he's never believed that Elias was actually a divine being. One possessed of great power and magic, sure, but that's different.]

I don't know. Maybe that's the whole problem. I've never come at this like a religion.

[ huh. ]

Then what did you come at it as? Solace...?

[ because guess what so did he ]

[He nods.]

I've always thought of it somethin' like a self-help group. It keeps me grounded. Keeps me from losin' myself to my snake brain.

[A little like Monsters Anonymous.]

It's a community of folks who are just tryin' to make their life here a little better. And I want to keep givin' folks that, because lord knows people deserve to have solidarity and support here if they want it, and I have a lot more resources to do it with the Fourth behind me than without him. I don't like that, exactly, but it's the truth of things.

So kind of what I did.

Sort of.

[ He taps his chin. ]

What drew you to Marco?

[Oh. Well that's sort of... it's not exactly a non-sequitur but it still catches Fiddleford by surprise. That's an awful personal question of Rohan to be asking, but then, this whole conversation has suddenly gotten very personal.

He doesn't know how he feels about that, in all honesty. He still doesn't know if he can trust Rohan, really, but Rohan invited him here in good faith and despite that hiccup earlier hasn't actually hurt him. He can't trust Rohan, just like he can't really trust most people, but he can at least believe that Rohan's intentions are probably not evil at this particular moment.]

... This is goin' to sound stupid, but he was from California. We knew the same places. He was the first normal thing I found in this place and I needed that those first couple of days. And then he was always so thoughtful. He never treated me like I was wrong to be... to be scared. He never judged me or told me I ought to just suck it up or walk it off or nothin' like that.

[His grammar slips a little. He doesn't notice. It's hard to talk about this when he loved Marco, when he still loves Marco, and is grappling with how deeply Marco hurt him.]

He understood better than anyone.

[ Cute.

That's kind of CUTE. In the worst possible way. Rohan doesn't make any faces-- no smile, no grimace; he just watches the naga and how he reacts. His intentions are pretty neutral. He's learning.

And Rohan loves to learn about people. ]

It's nice when you find someone who understands. I can't really relate. Jotaro had a lot of baggage that I couldn't possibly fathom. I felt that we always had a disconnect there.

[ i'm not saying i ENVY you or anything hahahahahaha ]

[It was cute, wasn't it? Uglycute, like a crosseyed puppy.]

Well I'm not sayin' we didn't have that, sometimes. There were things he was dealin' with that I couldn't... I mean I tried my best. That's what you do when you love someone.

[It's not normal to hear voices in your head, Marco! It's not healthy to listen to what they say!]

[ Whatever Rohan is doing, he stops. He stops focusing on wherever the emotional part of this conversation is headed. He tied himself into a knot-- painted himself in a corner, if you will. His hands glide through the air, conjuring up a pencil from the desk to play with between his fingers.

Time to stall. ]

Excellently put, Fiddleford. You open up, you accommodate, you try your best... [ A beat. A furrow of his brow and a twitch of his lips.

SNAP goes that pencil. ]

It's why I don't trust people.

Y'know, I don't either, usually?

[He's tired and he's hurt and he's tipsy and he should have stopped a couple of layers of familiarity back but he needs to talk about this if he's ever going to wrap his head around it.]

Never have. Trusted people. Hope for the best, plan for the worst, y'know. That's not trust, that's just bein' optimistic because the alternative's assumin' everyone's goin' to turn on you eventually and that's no way to live.

He's the first person since my wife I trusted and I should've figured it'd go the same way.

[ Rohan literally cannot blame this on alcohol. He dragged his own garbage kicking and screaming to the surface but he'll keep it on Fiddleford for now. ]

Things don't always go the way we want them to.

No. No, they sure as hell don't. He didn't even mean for this to happen, y'know. It wasn't his fault. Elias played him, I think.

[And now he's going to take the fall for it. Already is, but Fiddleford has a lot more problems with 'but maybe it's a good thing' than he does with the thing itself. If Marco hadn't tried to justify it things wouldn't have spiraled so badly.]

I haven't asked him. Elias. I mean. I haven't asked him how much of this was on purpose. Don't want to know the answer, bein' honest.

[ He plays with the snapped bits of pencil idly. ]

But do you think Elias will give you an honest answer?

No. That's one of the reasons I don't much want to know it.

[He runs a hand back through his hair, closes his eyes. Breathes in. Breathes out. God, he hates this.]

You said -- you said had. Earlier. Past tense. What happened?

[He didn't really know Jotaro and it's not as though he keeps up with Rohan's social life. This is news.]

Ryslig IC Contact

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""" NO NEED TO BE RUDE """

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did rohan really pull a thats rough buddy

what did you expect

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